Ummmmmm....

Okay, this might scare some people, but I actually drove today. I mean I was literally behind the driver's seat for the first time in my life. It was kind of surreal at first. I mean, last time I drove something with a motor it was a four-wheeler, and I rolled it. Plus, I expected to be really bad and make mistakes, but I actually did pretty good. We did some stuff that'll be on the driving test (which is a ways away, but if I can do it now, imagine me with practice), and the only problems I had were parallel parking and lined parking in front of a side walk. But in my defense, the sidewalk was diagonal to the road. :P
Anyway, I'm also starting college in a few weeks. I'm soooo nervous, but I'm also a little excited. I get like that when I'm moving to a new life-phase. I feel like the girl in the book I'm reading, called My Ridiculous, Romantic Obsessions. She's not pretty, or anything like that, same as me, but she's also a major fan of romance novels, which really hit it on the nail for me because people who like those books tend to have unrealistic expectations for romantic relationships. Et voila, in the first couple pages, the heroine meets a Really Hot Guy she calls "Adonis". I rest my case. I do feel that the two will end up together, even though she's--I hate to say it--average (like me, for the most part). I'll have to keep you posted on how I feel about the book.

Depression, Guys, and All-Around YUCK

Oy. So I got an extension on my speech class. The problem? I still have to do it. Gosh darn required classes make my life a misery, in more ways than one. I'm also (mostly) suffering through Calculus, Chemistry, Government, and Economics. Fuuuun. Economics is easy and all that, and I understand why we take it, but that doesn't mean I like it. It makes it boring, which is definitely not good.
I guess I should probably explain why I'm in a bad mood right now. The fact is, what's really bothering me is that Saturday I met this awesome guy and we had this really long conversation about everything... except our names. I only know where he's from, and I'm afraid I might even have that wrong. See, one of my friends used to live in the same town, and I tried finding out who he is using her connections, but it didn't work too well. So I have this guy that I could totally fall for, but I can't find him. It's like Cinderella with the roles switched and no shoe. So that has me kind of depressed, plus I still have three units in my speech class, including the last speech that I can't seem to get into, and added in I have homework pretty much every night, it's homecoming, and I have no date to the dance and no guy on my mind (that I can get in touch with) to console me. Plus the guy that I've liked for who knows how long has showed his true colors and I'm finally giving up the ghost on that faint hope.
It makes me wonder, you know? What is it about me that's such total anathema to guys? I mean good guys, the ones I like and would actually date. It's been like this for as long as I can remember, and I can't see any sign of stopping anytime soon. My mom won't stop talking about my speech long enough for me to figure out a new topic, either, which isn't helping AT ALL. I just don't know what to do. I'm not sure how to get past this so that I can do all the things that I need to do. Mostly, I just wanna find him and see if he felt the same thing I did. I wanna know if there could be something there.