Thursday, September 3, 2009

Depression, Guys, and All-Around YUCK

Oy. So I got an extension on my speech class. The problem? I still have to do it. Gosh darn required classes make my life a misery, in more ways than one. I'm also (mostly) suffering through Calculus, Chemistry, Government, and Economics. Fuuuun. Economics is easy and all that, and I understand why we take it, but that doesn't mean I like it. It makes it boring, which is definitely not good.
I guess I should probably explain why I'm in a bad mood right now. The fact is, what's really bothering me is that Saturday I met this awesome guy and we had this really long conversation about everything... except our names. I only know where he's from, and I'm afraid I might even have that wrong. See, one of my friends used to live in the same town, and I tried finding out who he is using her connections, but it didn't work too well. So I have this guy that I could totally fall for, but I can't find him. It's like Cinderella with the roles switched and no shoe. So that has me kind of depressed, plus I still have three units in my speech class, including the last speech that I can't seem to get into, and added in I have homework pretty much every night, it's homecoming, and I have no date to the dance and no guy on my mind (that I can get in touch with) to console me. Plus the guy that I've liked for who knows how long has showed his true colors and I'm finally giving up the ghost on that faint hope.
It makes me wonder, you know? What is it about me that's such total anathema to guys? I mean good guys, the ones I like and would actually date. It's been like this for as long as I can remember, and I can't see any sign of stopping anytime soon. My mom won't stop talking about my speech long enough for me to figure out a new topic, either, which isn't helping AT ALL. I just don't know what to do. I'm not sure how to get past this so that I can do all the things that I need to do. Mostly, I just wanna find him and see if he felt the same thing I did. I wanna know if there could be something there.

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