Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Here we go again

I got an email from my dad this morning that I'd been expecting, but still...
Chet died Sunday night. And I know we've been expecting it for almost two months and he's been getting ready to go for years, but...He's one of the two grandpas I can really remember. I don't remember a lot about Grandpa Kevin or Oscar because I was so young when they died, and Chet just stepped in. He treated us like family, like we really were his grandkids, even though we're not blood-kin. There are so many times he stepped in to try and help us through, like when he told Grandma to give me money for my Europe trip and they made me work for it. It meant so much more because of that. If they hadn't had me work for that money, I probably would've been like half the other kids on the trip who had the money handed to them and were told, "Go have fun, and bring me back a souvenir."
I don't think people realize how special it is that he just accepted us like that. Some of his kids and grandkids had a really hard time with it, and for him it was like it was as easy as breathing. That doesn't mean we always got along. I remember being almost scared of Chet for quite a while as a kid. But...he was "Grandpa Chet" in my head, even when I just said "Chet" out loud.
It seems kind of surreal, because I'm in Utah and I'm not there. It's almost like I'll get home and there he'll be, sitting in his big easy chair watching football or some random Hallmark Channel movie that I've never even heard of before. But in my head I know that-that won't happen. He's not going to be there, and I'm going to be going to his funeral. A week, and he'll be gone from my life. Yet I feel as if he's right here, telling me that I'm going to be all right, and so is everyone else. It'll just take time. Time I don't have, that I need for other things.
What will Taiya and Amber say if I tell them I didn't write anything on the novel this week because my grandpa died? For some reason I wonder if they'll believe me.
Anyway, as a result, my theme song for the day is "Missing You" from A Very Potter Musical. Without being taken at face value and without listening closely to the words...
Bye Chet. I hope you know that even though I've never said it, I do love you. Look out for Grandma, will you?

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